Dawn snuck through the fog and the smell of fresh coffee lingered in the air as my sleepy eyes moved over my to-do lists. My fingers found the keyboard and, without a thought, unlocked my Mac. My eyes narrowed as the screen lit up the room. I didn’t remember being on Facebook before walking away from my computer yesterday, but there it was, opened. A word finding game stared back at me. Typically I scrolled past, but for some reason I didn’t bother and my eyes made their way back to the Post-it notes on my desk.
My lists and to-do lists are written out on real paper because I love it when tasks are completed and I get to crunch the paper in my hands and toss it into the trash—swish, a job done. As a housewife, mom of three, and raising horses, I used to write lists filled with daily tasks so I wouldn’t feel as if I had done nothing all day between taking the boys to school, feeding horses, cleaning stalls, cleaning the house, and picking the boys up from school. My daily chores didn’t give me the feeling of accomplishment because in a matter of minutes, the horses messed their stalls, they needed feed and water again, the boy’s rooms and house were a mess again, and another meal needed to be cooked and the kitchen cleaned. On the days I felt I didn’t do anything, I could look in the bottom of my office trash and see dozens of crunched up colorful papers and know I had done something!
Getting out of bed today, I felt exhausted and wished I had actually accomplished all of the things I did while tossing and turning through the night. My eyes drifted back down to my Post-it note pad, but curiosity won. The computer screen lit my face, and my eyes scanned over the scrambled letters in the large box as three words popped out at me: Connection, Sons, and Gratitude. Then I read the instructions: First three words you see are your reality.
My boys are grown, and I no longer raise horses. I miss them and those days but am thankful I raised three amazing men and world champion horses, and though they may not be with me now, I have a deep connection with my three sons and horses are always in my heart.
Looking down at my to-do list I wrote: Give Gratitude for all my many blessings, Connections and Sons/children – two and four-legged. Even though I didn’t have to write this down, it felt good!